This past weekend my relationship ended with the cosmic whimper of a thousand kittens getting curb-stomped, the end of the best and worst 6 1/2 years of my life. Breaking up is a process, and I imagine it could be long, tumultuous, and ugly depending on the hour, but in the early stages it’s almost exclusively about hearing songs that up until three days ago you just enjoyed and now can’t listen to without losing your shit (current example: “Who’s Lovin’ You?” by the Jackson 5, a brilliantly written song with young Michael at his apex as a singer that I skillfully ignored the lyrics to for years until now). I have no scientific evidence to back up this claim, but I suspect that breakup songs, in some form or another, constitute an even larger percentage of the musical lexicon than hookup songs, and now is the time for me to listen to “It’s So Hard to Say Goodbye to Yesterday” on loop and cry myself to sleep only to wake up the next morning and start in with “End of the Road” because I don’t have the emotional energy to stand up and remove this Boyz II Men Greatest Hits CD.
Thank God there’s classical music. Continue reading